WHO'S THE DADDY!

Indians just love their mobile phones. Even though it is one of the poorest countries on earth everyone seems to have one, even the beggars on the street (they probably ring each other to see how business is doing!) This is why India has the quickest growing phone market in the world with 2.4 million new users every month! The biggest lovers of their phones though are the Indian men who seem to see it as some sort of penis extension. At every opportunity they can't wait to whack it out and show off their little handset, especially in front of the women. They parade all their phones capabilities by taking photos every second (Usually of me when I'm not looking, so they can show it to their mates and say I'm their girlfriend!) and playing some awful Bollywood music to the max when your trying to sleep on the bus. They must think, us westerners have never seen a phone before they way they carry on with theirs. I use to keep my phone hidden due to security and not wanting any attention, but with my recent annoyance with local men, I just couldn't resist pulling out the iPhone in front of them and seeing their facing drop at the sight of my penis extension. Who's the daddy now I thought.
It was only the phone stunt that gave me any sort of pleasure on my final train journey back to Delhi from Jaisalmer. The 19 hour journey, which turned into 24 hours due to delays, was so long long it felt like pulling teeth. Opposite me there was an American woman who instead of being fed up of Indian men's constant questioning, loved it, because it meant that she could about herself for hours on end (Being American she was very good at it!) I had to listen to how she had found her spiritual soul in India and about her meditation and all the Guru's she had met. All I could think of was I wonder how many of those Guru's she has probably slept. Then some strange half dead looking traveler guy (Some people stay in India to long!) appeared on the train and kept trying to talk to me. I think he was Irish but was not quite sure as I could not understand what he was saying half the time (To many drugs!)
After finally reaching Old Delhi train station, I then survived a Tuk Tuk drive from hell to Paharganj. The driver who had an extra thumb was the worst driver I have ever met in my life and believe me with all my time in Asia that is saying something. He bashed about 6 vehicles, knocked a old man off his bike, kept stopping to talk to his mates, and then dropped something under his seat and proceeded to look for it while still driving. Then at the end of it the cheeky bastard asked for a tip!, to which my response was: "Tip! Tip! You should be paying me for that journey. You have also added 10 years to me alone on one trip and as a woman reaching 30 next year I really don't need that now!" He smiled and laughed
"Yes madam! Tip madam!" I don't know why I bother sometimes!
I spent my last night in Delhi intending to do some shopping but after an encounter with a young jewellery designer who asked me to go and drink chai with him (He looked like my brothers best mate Adam, so I decided to trust him), I found myself with all his mates, (who were all young Kashmiri's,) and a group of Brits and Aussies drinking beer till midnight which is very hard core in India. So I got no shopping done and went out on a high on my last night which was needed after my negativity in Jaisalmer.
The flight home passed without much incident apart from the man next to me who kept doing smelly farts. Jan came to meet at the airport with a flower which I later left on the tube as we nearly missed our stop through gabbing. The flat was little changed apart from being more untidy and with more collected junk from the house mates taking up more space. The weather is like ice as predicted and I find myself not use to it anymore and have being wearing my sexy thermals under my clothes. I walked round the supermarket yesterday with the trolley in a daze not collecting anything and got myself in a bit of a tizz at the thought of having to select and cook a meal for the first time in over a month. So I had to ring Jan to come and help me much to his horror of having such a useless girlfriend. It's always the same when I get back from my travels: the readjustment to the cold, the orderliness of everyday life. it is everything that India is not. Yes India is dirty, poor, annoying and hard but I would not change it for the world. It is my favourite country out of all I have been to. It has a life and an unpredictability to it that makes it so exciting, like an adventure. I miss it already, well apart from the smell of urine.

FACTS OF INDIA

Yes no observations this time. I thought it would be nice to end my trip on something different!

* The largest employer in the world is the Indian railway system, employing over a million people !

* India has the most post offices in the world !

* The number of births that occur in India each year is higher than the entire population of Australia?

* The only country in the world that has a Bill of Rights for Cows is India?

* people below poverty line: about 260 million

* India's percentage of global car population
India's share of global car accidents: 10%

P.S This blog will be continuing. I know I said that last time, but this time I promise.