That's a wrap! 10 months! 10 God dam months of my life, here in Cardiff and its over. No more 6 day weeks, no more night shoots, no more crazy schedules, no more stress, no more CARDIFF! I have my life back, but the funniest thing happened during the clear up, a couple of days after the wrap: I burst into tears. Why? Because I'd been praying for the job to be over for so long, but then I was left with a feeling of complete sadness. Confused! Yes so was I, but then I realised what I have known for a long time. Coming to Cardiff was the best thing for me. I came here 10 months ago a broken person. I was truly miserable. I had left my home of 5 years that I loved and had been hurt by someone who I adored and who I never thought would treat me like he did. I felt like I had lost everything, but now I realise that was not true. Getting away from my old world and going somewhere completely different made me evaluate a lot things in my life and who I am and what I want. I have worked on myself for 10 months and realised things about myself I never knew. I know what I want, I know how I should be treated and I know what I deserve and I have never been able to say that before.
One of the best things about this job has been my costume family. It's been a tough 10 months with ups and downs but we have supported each other through out. They have lifted me and never put me down and made me feel good about myself, buts that's what real friends do. I've been a fool at times, I've been blind at others, by spending too much time and energy on people that were never worthy and never really cared about me. I have been clouded for so long, but now I see things more clearly and from that I feel calmer. I will still make mistakes but that's OK, because everyone does.
Cardiff I want to thank you. You pushed me to the edge sometimes but you were a journey that added to me as a person. I survived you Cardiff and that has to be an achievement in itself, doesn't it? Will I be going back? No bloody way! Ha ha.
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