Thomas (remember him; my German fling from the start of this adventure) once told me there was a tribe found not so long ago deep in the jungle. It was discovered, that in their language they had no words for the past or the future, only for the present. When western man introduced the past and the future into their psyche it ruined their minds. This is because life is all about living for the now. Maybe sometimes I think of the past too much; I hate to think of the future as it scares me, but there is one thing I know; I'm an impulsive person, always have been and always will be. I live for the moment, it excites me, I get a thrill from it. Maybe that's why I love traveling so much; the fact you never know what is going to happen and you just go with the flow. You live for the now, and it was precisely one of these implusive moments that happened to me the other week.
I traveled to Taganga a beach side town, with the Canadian couple Lauren and Travis. Matt and Nathan left to go to medellin and probably get drunk again! I checked myself into a dorm and decided to have an early night, as the room was empty. I was having a wonderful sleep until I was woken at 3am by my drunken room mates. I tried my best to ignore them but it was pretty hard especially when the bunk bed above you is rocking for half an hour ( he later said that was, because he was packing his bags; hmm is that code for something)! I was so annoyed, I thought they were a bunch of wankers! When I woke I was ready to give them a piece of my mind. This was really hard as they were still drunk and running around the place packing their bags. I sat on the outdoor hammock and waited for them to leave, but they kept chatting to me. They were three Aussie guys called Craig, Ruben, and Arnold, and actually as we got chatting, I realised I found them highly amusing. They were packing to go on a trek for 5 days to the lost city or Ciudad Perdida as it's called. Now I had really wanted to do this but still only had a pair of shit converse and wasn't sure on my fitness level. I told them this but they said I should go with them as there was a space free. F**k it, I thought, you only live once and my impulse told me this was going to be fun. So after only knowing these three guys for half an hour, I packed my bags and headed off into the jungle with them. This now, what follows is the story of my 5 days in the jungle with them. One word: CRAZY
I traveled to Taganga a beach side town, with the Canadian couple Lauren and Travis. Matt and Nathan left to go to medellin and probably get drunk again! I checked myself into a dorm and decided to have an early night, as the room was empty. I was having a wonderful sleep until I was woken at 3am by my drunken room mates. I tried my best to ignore them but it was pretty hard especially when the bunk bed above you is rocking for half an hour ( he later said that was, because he was packing his bags; hmm is that code for something)! I was so annoyed, I thought they were a bunch of wankers! When I woke I was ready to give them a piece of my mind. This was really hard as they were still drunk and running around the place packing their bags. I sat on the outdoor hammock and waited for them to leave, but they kept chatting to me. They were three Aussie guys called Craig, Ruben, and Arnold, and actually as we got chatting, I realised I found them highly amusing. They were packing to go on a trek for 5 days to the lost city or Ciudad Perdida as it's called. Now I had really wanted to do this but still only had a pair of shit converse and wasn't sure on my fitness level. I told them this but they said I should go with them as there was a space free. F**k it, I thought, you only live once and my impulse told me this was going to be fun. So after only knowing these three guys for half an hour, I packed my bags and headed off into the jungle with them. This now, what follows is the story of my 5 days in the jungle with them. One word: CRAZY
DAY 1
We get picked up from our hostel and driven to meet the rest of the group in Santa Marta. I'm very aware that the Aussies are still wasted, especially Biskey (Arnold's nick name) as he is still drinking straight rum from the bottle! We get to Santa Marta where we meet the rest of the group, who are Swiss and German and who look very serious. The Aussies want to get provisions which consists of a bottle of vodka, two bottles of rum and beers which they drink on the way and make me have one too as I get called pussy fag if I don't! ( pussy fag will be a term used a lot in this post, I also get called slag a lot just due to the fact I'm English and I told them a story about some Israeli guys calling all English girls slags, which they found great)! We then set out on a three hour drive, on which the Aussies drank the whole time; they start calling the Swiss, swissy fags; the driver looks scared as Ruben and Craig have told him in bad Spanish that Biskey likes men and he fancies him; Biskey is sat next to the driver still pissed leaning over to him asking questions like is there Wi Fi in the jungle, totally unaware of the fact that the driver thinks he's coming on to him and I'm just sat there thinking what the hell have I done coming on this trip! We eventually reach the start village of our trek, but that's not before a local woman that was sat on the roof of our jeep, that none of knew was up there falls off on the Rocky road. She just got up and laughed and got back on, while we were all sat there in shock! We meet our guide, Carlos who has the greatest handle bar moustache ever and doesn't speak a word of English. He gets my rucksack and puts it on a mule. Great! I think, we don't have to carry our bags! Wrong! I don't have to carry my bag, but everyone else does, why I don't know! The Aussies soon pick up on this and as we start walking, shout out, so everyone can hear, "carly, why are you not carrying your bag"? The rest of the group give me evil looks. I go red. As the real walking begins, the Aussies begin to suffer and they are even sweating alcohol, especially Biskey, who stinks of rum. After over four hours of mainly uphill walking, we reach our first cabina for our food and sleep that night. Now most normal people after suffering so badly from alcohol, would eat and go to bed early. Not the Aussies! The first thing they get is beer, in fact that's the only word they know in Spanish. While the rest of the other trekking groups sharing the cabina that night, have nice talk and play cards, the Aussies get very drunk and loud. Even when going to bed ( which is just hammock with a mozzie net, they are loud and get told to shut up by everyone, but they really don't give a shit! Day one and they have managed to piss off the entire cabina. God help me!
We get picked up from our hostel and driven to meet the rest of the group in Santa Marta. I'm very aware that the Aussies are still wasted, especially Biskey (Arnold's nick name) as he is still drinking straight rum from the bottle! We get to Santa Marta where we meet the rest of the group, who are Swiss and German and who look very serious. The Aussies want to get provisions which consists of a bottle of vodka, two bottles of rum and beers which they drink on the way and make me have one too as I get called pussy fag if I don't! ( pussy fag will be a term used a lot in this post, I also get called slag a lot just due to the fact I'm English and I told them a story about some Israeli guys calling all English girls slags, which they found great)! We then set out on a three hour drive, on which the Aussies drank the whole time; they start calling the Swiss, swissy fags; the driver looks scared as Ruben and Craig have told him in bad Spanish that Biskey likes men and he fancies him; Biskey is sat next to the driver still pissed leaning over to him asking questions like is there Wi Fi in the jungle, totally unaware of the fact that the driver thinks he's coming on to him and I'm just sat there thinking what the hell have I done coming on this trip! We eventually reach the start village of our trek, but that's not before a local woman that was sat on the roof of our jeep, that none of knew was up there falls off on the Rocky road. She just got up and laughed and got back on, while we were all sat there in shock! We meet our guide, Carlos who has the greatest handle bar moustache ever and doesn't speak a word of English. He gets my rucksack and puts it on a mule. Great! I think, we don't have to carry our bags! Wrong! I don't have to carry my bag, but everyone else does, why I don't know! The Aussies soon pick up on this and as we start walking, shout out, so everyone can hear, "carly, why are you not carrying your bag"? The rest of the group give me evil looks. I go red. As the real walking begins, the Aussies begin to suffer and they are even sweating alcohol, especially Biskey, who stinks of rum. After over four hours of mainly uphill walking, we reach our first cabina for our food and sleep that night. Now most normal people after suffering so badly from alcohol, would eat and go to bed early. Not the Aussies! The first thing they get is beer, in fact that's the only word they know in Spanish. While the rest of the other trekking groups sharing the cabina that night, have nice talk and play cards, the Aussies get very drunk and loud. Even when going to bed ( which is just hammock with a mozzie net, they are loud and get told to shut up by everyone, but they really don't give a shit! Day one and they have managed to piss off the entire cabina. God help me!
DAY 2
I wake early to find the only member of my group awake, is the middle aged German business man who I still only know to this day, as German number one ( the Aussie dingos just referred to all the Germans as one, two and three and the Swiss were just referred to as swissy fags, so I never knew anyone's names). German No 1 is moaning to me about the Aussies behaviour and how loud and rude they are. He asks me if all Aussies are like this. I reply "most of them"! We set out on day two, to lots of mud as it rained a lot the night before. My converse are covered and I'm sliding everywhere, but luckily Carlos makes me a stick. Today is our shortest walk, so we all go for a swim in the river, where we can jump off a 10m rock into the water. When it get's to my turn I get scared as it's so high up, and don't want to do it.Then I stand there for 5 minutes being called a pussy fag by the Aussies until I do it ( there is nothing like peer pressure)! Craig tries to be fancy by diving in but fluffs it and we all start laughing and calling him a pussy fag, but then we realise there is something very wrong! He has dislocated is arm. It's awful! He can't get it back in . Everyone starts to get very worried. I start to shout to Carlos and the other guide in bad Spanish. The fat guide who is with Carlos summons poor Craig over who is in so much pain, and calmly puts his shoulder back in. Relief! That night the Aussies buy a ton more of beer, as the excuse is to num craigs pain! The local indigenous people are very happy as the Aussies are making them lots of money by buying lots of beer.
I wake early to find the only member of my group awake, is the middle aged German business man who I still only know to this day, as German number one ( the Aussie dingos just referred to all the Germans as one, two and three and the Swiss were just referred to as swissy fags, so I never knew anyone's names). German No 1 is moaning to me about the Aussies behaviour and how loud and rude they are. He asks me if all Aussies are like this. I reply "most of them"! We set out on day two, to lots of mud as it rained a lot the night before. My converse are covered and I'm sliding everywhere, but luckily Carlos makes me a stick. Today is our shortest walk, so we all go for a swim in the river, where we can jump off a 10m rock into the water. When it get's to my turn I get scared as it's so high up, and don't want to do it.Then I stand there for 5 minutes being called a pussy fag by the Aussies until I do it ( there is nothing like peer pressure)! Craig tries to be fancy by diving in but fluffs it and we all start laughing and calling him a pussy fag, but then we realise there is something very wrong! He has dislocated is arm. It's awful! He can't get it back in . Everyone starts to get very worried. I start to shout to Carlos and the other guide in bad Spanish. The fat guide who is with Carlos summons poor Craig over who is in so much pain, and calmly puts his shoulder back in. Relief! That night the Aussies buy a ton more of beer, as the excuse is to num craigs pain! The local indigenous people are very happy as the Aussies are making them lots of money by buying lots of beer.
DAY 3
I wake to find Carlos has made me my own special hot chocolate as I don't like tea or coffee, he also makes sure I get my food first. Biskey has been given the new name of el Tigre as he snores so loud he was made to go and sleep in a hammock far away from everyone else last night. Today I have to carry my own ruck sack as Carlos will carry Craigs! I suppose it's only fair as he did dislocate his arm! The first part of today was all up hill and is tough but I'm keeping up with the guys. We even have to do big river crossings. As we stop for refreshments we are joined by two new members of our group; Ed an Italian and Jess a fellow Brit, who have caught up with us as they are only doing the trek in 4 days. Now I don't what happened here but I suddenly got a huge energy surge and I just want to keep walking and before I know it its just me and Ed with the porter way out front. I can't believe it and I'm carrying my backpack and wearing converse. I feel like action woman. Amazing! As to keep up with the two guys I do what they do I cross the rivers with my shoes on and take the short cut climbing up rocks. We make it to the Cabina. I feel so proud of myself. We wait and we wait but there is no sign of the group. It's over an hour later when the first of them start to show and everyone is walking very slowly with the biggest grin on their faces. It soon becomes apparent, the rest of the group are stoned! Brilliant! Then last but not least German No 1 appears. Oh my god! Yes the middle aged German is completely stoned too. He is so bad he is walking up the river the wrong way. The whole group starts cheering. I'm in shock! After lunch which, Carlos cooked me my own special meal as I don't like sandwiches ( for you who don't know I have a phobia of them!) I went for a little siesta as I was tired. I was woken an hour later by cheers. I went down to the stream to investigate, only to find the Aussies had brought a huge big box of beers for all the guys and they were all now playing some stupid retard game of throwing rocks at rocks ( it doesn't take much to make men happy!) worst of all they have got Carlos our guide completely drunk and all this while I had a short siesta. The Aussies seem to have corrupted the whole group. Carlos gets one of the group to translate that we are the best group he has ever had, and the indigenous people love the Aussies because they are alcoholics and make them rich. What the hell! The night only gets more crazy when the Aussies decide to buy a 100 beers for the night, for our group to consume. They also think it is funny to tell Carlos who is now known as my Colombian husband what number bed I'm sleeping in. Arse holes! Luckily that night I didn't have any visitors!
I wake to find Carlos has made me my own special hot chocolate as I don't like tea or coffee, he also makes sure I get my food first. Biskey has been given the new name of el Tigre as he snores so loud he was made to go and sleep in a hammock far away from everyone else last night. Today I have to carry my own ruck sack as Carlos will carry Craigs! I suppose it's only fair as he did dislocate his arm! The first part of today was all up hill and is tough but I'm keeping up with the guys. We even have to do big river crossings. As we stop for refreshments we are joined by two new members of our group; Ed an Italian and Jess a fellow Brit, who have caught up with us as they are only doing the trek in 4 days. Now I don't what happened here but I suddenly got a huge energy surge and I just want to keep walking and before I know it its just me and Ed with the porter way out front. I can't believe it and I'm carrying my backpack and wearing converse. I feel like action woman. Amazing! As to keep up with the two guys I do what they do I cross the rivers with my shoes on and take the short cut climbing up rocks. We make it to the Cabina. I feel so proud of myself. We wait and we wait but there is no sign of the group. It's over an hour later when the first of them start to show and everyone is walking very slowly with the biggest grin on their faces. It soon becomes apparent, the rest of the group are stoned! Brilliant! Then last but not least German No 1 appears. Oh my god! Yes the middle aged German is completely stoned too. He is so bad he is walking up the river the wrong way. The whole group starts cheering. I'm in shock! After lunch which, Carlos cooked me my own special meal as I don't like sandwiches ( for you who don't know I have a phobia of them!) I went for a little siesta as I was tired. I was woken an hour later by cheers. I went down to the stream to investigate, only to find the Aussies had brought a huge big box of beers for all the guys and they were all now playing some stupid retard game of throwing rocks at rocks ( it doesn't take much to make men happy!) worst of all they have got Carlos our guide completely drunk and all this while I had a short siesta. The Aussies seem to have corrupted the whole group. Carlos gets one of the group to translate that we are the best group he has ever had, and the indigenous people love the Aussies because they are alcoholics and make them rich. What the hell! The night only gets more crazy when the Aussies decide to buy a 100 beers for the night, for our group to consume. They also think it is funny to tell Carlos who is now known as my Colombian husband what number bed I'm sleeping in. Arse holes! Luckily that night I didn't have any visitors!
DAY 4
we wake early to start our climb to the lost city. I realise now that walking through the river with my shoes on was not the best idea. They are still soaking and it's so cold, but I have no other choice and just have to bare it. It is so hard to get my shoes on and off now, that Carlos insists on giving me a piggy back across the river. Well it's the least a husband can do! I am now given the name of princess, which I think is better than slag. Carlos also has a big head ache and asks for pills ( funny that).To get to the lost city we have to climb nearly 2000 steep very slippery steps, but it's worth it. Ciudad perdida is beautiful. The sky is blue and the view is amazing. A wonderful moment. As I'm taking this in, my moment is shattered by "Cerveza frio"! Yes the Aussies! They are really excited as they have found a shack at the top of the lost city that sells cold beers! Can you believe it? Well yes I can as nothing on this trek shocks me anymore. We then bump into the army as they guard the lost city as the area is in the heart of the cocaine growing industry and can be quite dangerous. The Aussies also seem to piss off the army guys as they want to get Biskey to have his picture taken next to their military radio and pretend it's jungle Wi Fi. Carlos drags us away before someone shoots them. We have a long walk back to the next cabina and I start to get terrible stomach pains. My feet are also starting to get cut and blistered from my shoes. Carlos insists on taking my bag again and again, mainly from the girls, I get evil stares, but I don't really care by now. We reach the cabina and of course it's beer time again, but I have a early one as I'm so tired. As I've not been sleeping well the Aussies give me a Valium, which mixed with beer was actually a great feeling and I'm out cold in no time. Thank god for the Aussies.
we wake early to start our climb to the lost city. I realise now that walking through the river with my shoes on was not the best idea. They are still soaking and it's so cold, but I have no other choice and just have to bare it. It is so hard to get my shoes on and off now, that Carlos insists on giving me a piggy back across the river. Well it's the least a husband can do! I am now given the name of princess, which I think is better than slag. Carlos also has a big head ache and asks for pills ( funny that).To get to the lost city we have to climb nearly 2000 steep very slippery steps, but it's worth it. Ciudad perdida is beautiful. The sky is blue and the view is amazing. A wonderful moment. As I'm taking this in, my moment is shattered by "Cerveza frio"! Yes the Aussies! They are really excited as they have found a shack at the top of the lost city that sells cold beers! Can you believe it? Well yes I can as nothing on this trek shocks me anymore. We then bump into the army as they guard the lost city as the area is in the heart of the cocaine growing industry and can be quite dangerous. The Aussies also seem to piss off the army guys as they want to get Biskey to have his picture taken next to their military radio and pretend it's jungle Wi Fi. Carlos drags us away before someone shoots them. We have a long walk back to the next cabina and I start to get terrible stomach pains. My feet are also starting to get cut and blistered from my shoes. Carlos insists on taking my bag again and again, mainly from the girls, I get evil stares, but I don't really care by now. We reach the cabina and of course it's beer time again, but I have a early one as I'm so tired. As I've not been sleeping well the Aussies give me a Valium, which mixed with beer was actually a great feeling and I'm out cold in no time. Thank god for the Aussies.
DAY 5
It's the last day, but we have the biggest hike today. It actually hurts to put my shoes on now, but I do. God dam converse, I should of learnt my lesson by now with them after that volcano in indonesia (actually I have erased that event from my head after what happened on that trek! Read the blog post because I can't talk about what went on there anymore)! I am soon at the back of the pack as it hurts to walk. The boys tell me not to be a pussy fag! I tell them to shut it! Four hours in, the pain is unbearable and there is no other option. I have to do the rest of the trek bare foot! I take my shoes off and my feet are bleeding. Bare foot is not easy and it's sore but better than those shoes. Everyone tells me I'm crazy. I don't care. If the indigenous people can do it bare foot, so can I! The end village is an amazing site. I did it! We did it! I'm not going to tell myself I can't do anything anymore because I can. My confidence since I have been traveling on my own has been soaring. We celebrate with a great meal and guess what? Yes that's right! BEER. The Aussies even buy the local school teachers having lunch next to us beer! Right near the end of the walk German No 1 was walking with me and said, " when people will ask me what I think of Aussies, I don't know what to say! You really shouldn't really like them but you do"! He summed it up in one. The 5 days on that trek has probably been the highlight of my trip so far. I'm having the time of my life. I'm glad I followed my impulse and will keep doing so, because I'm living for now and that's the best way to be.
It's the last day, but we have the biggest hike today. It actually hurts to put my shoes on now, but I do. God dam converse, I should of learnt my lesson by now with them after that volcano in indonesia (actually I have erased that event from my head after what happened on that trek! Read the blog post because I can't talk about what went on there anymore)! I am soon at the back of the pack as it hurts to walk. The boys tell me not to be a pussy fag! I tell them to shut it! Four hours in, the pain is unbearable and there is no other option. I have to do the rest of the trek bare foot! I take my shoes off and my feet are bleeding. Bare foot is not easy and it's sore but better than those shoes. Everyone tells me I'm crazy. I don't care. If the indigenous people can do it bare foot, so can I! The end village is an amazing site. I did it! We did it! I'm not going to tell myself I can't do anything anymore because I can. My confidence since I have been traveling on my own has been soaring. We celebrate with a great meal and guess what? Yes that's right! BEER. The Aussies even buy the local school teachers having lunch next to us beer! Right near the end of the walk German No 1 was walking with me and said, " when people will ask me what I think of Aussies, I don't know what to say! You really shouldn't really like them but you do"! He summed it up in one. The 5 days on that trek has probably been the highlight of my trip so far. I'm having the time of my life. I'm glad I followed my impulse and will keep doing so, because I'm living for now and that's the best way to be.
Thanks for sharing the trek. "Good on ya" for following your instincts, and enjoying the outcome. In reading this I felt like I was on the trip at times. I like Aussies too. Reuben is nuts, but he's a great guy. I'm sure his mates are all cool too. I grew up in Germany, am American and spent 11 years in Oz. Germans can be dull, Americans, err, well I better not comment, and Australians are amazing. Irreverent, kind, free-spirits, and funny as hell. You'll meet so many more people that will surprise you. Enjoy your future living in the present!
ReplyDeletehaha nice read, represent fellas!!
ReplyDelete